On This Day – I was Diagnosed with Cancer

From the archives… I posted this last year but the message remains as true as ever…

Nicola Bourne

It was the 4th January 2012 that I was diagnosed with bowel cancer.  I remember it like it was yesterday.  My dad coming over to watch my 3-month-old daughter and 2-year-old son whilst my husband took me to the hospital for my long-awaited colonoscopy.

I knew instantly that there was a problem, as soon as the consultant began the procedure – the weird looks and awkward silences when I asked what was wrong.  The nurse wouldn’t tell me what was happening, saying only that I should wait for the consultant to come and see me.  When the consultant finally did come, he said that he wanted my husband present.  All of this combined with the feeling in my heart and stomach meant I knew, before the consultant told me.  I knew that I had bowel cancer.  You can read all about my diagnosis here if you want to know more…

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Nicola B and the TWO Big C’s

I actually can’t believe that I posted this blog post 3 years ago! And still the importance to keep informing and spreading the message continues… Life with a colostomy…

Nicola Bourne

photo copyObviously the first one is Cancer.  But I have another big C, in a lot of ways it is a bigger C, certainly to me, so big that I often don’t really speak about it.  The other big C is my Colostomy.

For those who don’t know, a Colostomy is when you have part of your large intestine removed and what’s left diverted through the abdomen wall.  There are occasions when the procedure can be reversed but not in my case.  Truth be told, I struggled with finding out I needed a colostomy more than finding out I had cancer – cancer I could deal with, this I couldn’t.  I thought it was the absolute worst thing that could happen to me and I went into a very strange denial, praying it wouldn’t happen right until I woke up from my surgery.

I actually said if I didn’t have kids…

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Summer Reception with Bowel Cancer UK

Fun, emotional, heartbreaking and inspiring - just your standard Thursday night! I was so excited a few weeks ago to receive an invitation to Bowel Cancer UK's Summer Reception and the event was finally held on Thursday evening. Held at the Royal College of General Practitioners on an amazing roof-terrace in London there was a [...]

Cancer, the Benefit of Hindsight and the Lowest of the Low

An article that I wrote a year ago today, which can still sometimes seem very relevant…

Nicola Bourne

A lady wrote to me recently praising my positive attitude to having cancer.  This lady also went on to say that her son had cancer and that he was in a very negative place and she had tried encouraging him to read my blog to gain a different perspective but that he wasn’t interested and so fearful for the future and asked if I ever felt like that?

I wrote back saying YES!

But her question made me think how important it is to discuss the lowest lows that you go through when dealing with cancer.  I have a wonderful friend who stayed so positive throughout her whole treatment.  She had breast cancer and has been all clear for years but looking back she says she never allowed herself to think the worst.  She felt remaining positive was integral to her getting better and she never allowed negativity to creep in.

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The Top 6 Things I Learnt at BritMums Live

For those who don't know BritMums Live is a blogging conference and oh my day's was it a blast, down largely to the joy of meeting some fantastic bloggers - yes Jennie, I'm talking about you!  I have never been to anything like this before but here are the top 6 things I learnt from [...]

To the woman who tutted at me using the disabled toilets…

So fantastic, thought it was worth a reblog! What a star for sharing x

So Bad Ass

Dear lady who loudly tutted at me using the disabled loos,

I know you saw me running in, with my able bodied legs and all. You saw me opening the door with my two working arms. You saw me without a wheelchair. Without any visible sign of disability.

You tutted loudly as I rattled the handle with my hands that work perfectly and my able voice call to my kids that I’d be out in just a minute.

My lack of wheelchair may have suggested to you that I was some lazy cow who didn’t care. Some inconsiderate bitch who was using something I wasn’t entitled too. (I actually carry a card to explain that I’m entitled to and have a disability key if you’d have cared to ask). You may have seen my face blushing as I caught your eye and assumed I was showing guilt at blagging the…

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