Well that was NOT part of the plan when my family and I decided to go on a dream family holiday to Mauritius!
My husband and I worked, saved and planned for months. We were so excited to finally be going and once there, it was as close to paradise as I could have hoped. We were all having the perfect time – until…
A few days in I started to feel unwell. There was a medical centre on site and a nurse gave me some rehydration sachets. I did keep saying that it felt more like a bladder infection but it was considered dehydration. I know that with a colostomy dehydration is an extreme issue, so I was furious with myself that I had become dehydrated. But the sachets didn’t help, in fact when I tried to drink one, I instantly threw it back up again – sexy!
Back to the medical center where it was agreed – it was a bladder and possibly now a kidney infection as well but not to worry, oral antibiotics and you should feel better in a day or two. Sorted.
Not so. By the next day I was convulsing, vomiting and had a temperature of 40c. The medical team sent me straight to hospital. I can’t lie, the journey to hospital was petrifying. It was an hour and a half away. I had to go by taxi on my own because it was too far for an ambulance to come and Husband had to stay with the kids. I had no idea what to expect when I got there – a posh private clinic, or like something off an episode of panorama. The hospital was fine, basic, but fine and the staff were really wonderful.
Arriving at hospital I was delirious and writhing in pain. The doctors wouldn’t give me any medication until they ran tests, sorted my insurance and had my passport so the next hour was pretty awful and involved a lot of tears as I played the worlds smallest violin to myself.
Quick side note: I couldn’t be admitted until my insurance was sorted and they took my passport as a guarantee of payment which I didn’t have with me, the nurse seemed to think couldn’t be admitted (more crying/violin playing) until thankfully someone was able to come and help me be admitted without my passport. There was security on all the doors so no one can leave and they only removed the drip and cannula once the bill has been paid. I understand why, but I really was reminded how lucky I am to live in a country with a National Health Service. It might not be perfect but at least you never have to fear being turned away from a hospital like I nearly was, or worry about paying the bill – that truly is amazing. But anyway – back to the story…
I was diagnosed with a chronic bladder, kidney and blood infections – septicaemia. It was the septicaemia that was causing the convulsing and fitting. I had non-stop drips running for three days with antibiotics, liquid and painkillers. Honestly I can’t explain how ill I was.
The only other time I have felt that bad was when I was having chemo and a junior doctor gave me the wrong amount of morphine and I overdosed.
Because the hospital was so far from the hotel, it wasn’t easy for my family to visit so I spent most of the three days I was in there contemplating being severely ill again. Obviously it’s not like my cancer was back but being hooked up to machines day and night, having numerous scans and tests – it all felt far too familiar and took me back to an emotionally dark place.
As there was a medical centre at my hotel, my consultant (after quite a lot of negotiation) agreed to let me convalesce in the hotel with the medical team supporting me. I couldn’t get out of bed and was on a lot of medication but who cares… I was back and with my family for the last few days of holiday.
The day I was released I saw a blog post from Consciously Healthy which seemed to sum up just how I was feeling. The author Emma was reflecting on how after a long recovery, she stopped giving her mind, body and soul the attention it deserved, till eventually her body gave-way again. This was exactly how felt. I know I didn’t have cancer again and my life is full of people and things that I love, but slowly my life had returned to crazy busy with little down time and having septicaemia made me realise it was time to have a little rethink!
I will be writing more about how and ‘if’ the rethink happened in a few days so check back or sign up for part 2…
Are there any times in your life when you have had a rethink? Or any tips for anyone else having a rethink? Please leave a comment and share you stories with us.
With love XX